Angry, hate, dissaponted, or whatever.
Today is my seventh day here (Sept. 3rd 2013), in Pare. TEST English School is the course I attend. We have lesson everyday, all day long till the 9 or 10 PM, even if it’s Sunday night. There was no really big problem I really felt on my first two days, but it turned out then. The early morning class (memorizing) killed my mood.
The early morning of my third day and the following days went weakly for my mood. But I could managed to finish them (the memorizing classes) under control. But this morning is slightly different.
I was late to come to the memorizing class, and as the result, I got the punishment. I couldn’t attend it. The monsieur (they call it “Mizu”) prohibited me to attend the class. Class was started at 5.30 AM, and I came at 5.33 AM. So, I was out, and that was the trigger.
The reason why I came late was because I had a problem with my stomach, and I was praying (shalat subuh). I am not blaming those things. I am only dissapointed. The Mizu should’ve been asked me why I was late. But he didn’t.
I didn’t do any argument at that time, cause I thought it would’ve made me fell in a mad emosional. I was just left the class silently. Actually I was already not feeling happy at the memorizing class before, but I was trying to deal with it. Someone pulled the trigger, and I was worried to remember that I was having the same situation when I was in college. The situation where I almost left the college forever.
Since the rule wouldn’t allow me to join the following classes in the same day (except for multimedia class). My feeling is separated by two big things. Unhappy or happy. I felt unhappy because of this situation, but something rebels of my self convinced me that this was not supposed to be a bad day. I got some free time today, and I can do some interesting things.
I shouldn’t be afraid, cause I have my own mind.
Nobody can control my self.
It just started to be interesting! Ha!